When in Doubt... Figure It Out

I am procrastinating from doing my homework for 15 minutes to share a story with you. Do you ever spend years, days, weeks, hours in doubt wondering if you picked the right path in life and the right career? I do all of the time, and this week--a hard and busy and stressful one at school--I started to severely doubt my purpose and interest in this very hands-on, video and editing centered journalism program. After all, I love writing and planned to do that after graduation so I was tempted to drop the video camera and surrender. And on top of the doubting, I developed a head cold and was feeling crappy. I was ready to quit it all today. But how things can change in a couple of hours.

Tonight I helped my classmate with her media project covering the 11th Annual Matthew Shepard March for Equal Rights. It is a gay rights parade and rally. I don't have time to explain the back stories, but it was a very powerful experience. As I was running around gathering video and interviews at the event tonight, I realized that I am just where I need to be. I was in the zone, and it was fun and exciting to be out there with those people and trying to learn their stories and help the public understand their story as a group. I realized that maybe television journalism could be for me, I just need the practice and that's why I am here. It's not all going to be fun and exciting or easy, but this is surely my niche.

I needed a night like tonight to remind me that I am in the right field and that there is a method to the madness. I left with renewed energy and spirit, mostly because I had a blast doing the work, but also because I fed off the emotions of those people marching for their rights. What I love about writing and journalism is discovering the human aspect of a story and giving it life. Tonight, I was able to be in the moment and appreciate what those people were fighting for. Life is hard. School is hard. And trying to write papers and concentrate with blocked sinuses is hard. But when the struggle of the moment is over, we come out better people. And ready to face the next one. For me, that's a couple papers and a media project on karaoke. And I can't waste any more time thinking about it.